27 October 2012

October's Thought: Creating an ecosystem of ideas

It's autumn again. The autumn wind whispers, and the maple leaves fall.

A seasonal change of colours, inspires the changes in the mind. Some would say it's a paradigm shift, I would call it an 'accidental autumnal thought'

You know, the beginning of the term of a final year, when everything is not as hectic yet, and you begin to imagine how to do more things with the limited time you have.

Like how you throw a boomerang near the Ayers Rock in Australia 4 years ago, it's time to get the boomerang back and throw it again to other places, before the final year ends. 

This time, the boomerang wants to wander more, before it goes back to where it used to be.

It has been quite while, you thought. There wasn't any new experience or ideas to write. 

The writing has been dull. How I wish I could find back the oasis of ideas. Therefore, I started to pick up activities which observe the beauty of things.

Like photography and acrylic painting, the two activities which teach you how to find the beauty in something, and capture it. 

Or, try to colour some imagination and creativity on it. The core idea is to make something beautiful. And, I think most of the times, we forget to find the beauty of something, in our daily lives. 

Well, I hope that those 2 activities will help to fuel my writing, and keep me going with more interesting stuff to write.

17 September 2012

Pictures

You touch the wall, walking down the small lane, thinking of the pictures in your heart.

The finger tips, ignited the flame of thoughts, as they glide through the surface.

A picture that is vivid, yet vague enough; clear but murky, stirring up bits and pieces.

Standing away, running away, not sure what should the body do and it falls. 

Falling hard, into a cosy dreamland; flying like a feather, defying gravity.

Newton was laughing at your stupidity, Einstein said you are flying in the speed of light.

Cuz the picture in the heart is travelling in time

Sinking in the ebbs of memories, 

Writing down the lyrics of an unknown feeling, under the traffic light, at the crossroad. 

-luminodreamer-

15 September 2012

Audition for Life

So, one day, everyone in the town was very excited. Something big was going on.

There was an audition. No requirement, just a desire to win. The prize is a huge amount of money.

Many people went for the audition and went back empty-handed. None of them passed through.

Some of them began to speculate, this was a scam. It was only held for the elites. But, this young kid did not think so.  He decided that he would like to go for a try.

Many, including his parents told him it would be a waste of time. Still, he wanted to try.

He went for the audition, and he won.

Many people asked him how.

"This is how, " he continued,

"The old lady asked me one question. 'Tell me a story of your life'. "

"I do not have one. But I always believe in having many small stories instead. The past that you wanted to hide so much. The future you want to achieve so much, and the present that you want to keep, and escape so much. "

"I don't know whether I have one, but I think I have. Mine is pretty ordinary I guess, and not that big to tell, but it's big enough to tell my parents and my grandchildren."

The old lady cried, and gave him the money.

*inspired by America's Got Talent*

12 September 2012

梦想和事业的对话-不放弃,不退缩。

今天天气比较晴朗,所以梦想和事业都约一约,打算出来咖啡店谈谈天。

梦想:yo! 事业,好久不见,近来无恙吧!

事业:唉,别谈了。老板给压力,累都累垮了。

梦想:那是当然的啦。你不是一早都知道了吗?

事业:知道又怎样。难道你知道驾车会用车油,很贵,你就不驾车,不抱怨吗?

梦想:那倒是。让我告诉你一些事吧。

事业:什么事?我很忙,很累。简短一些,用“三个重点”的方式告诉我。

梦想:你以前不是这样啊?人生的故事和历程,如何用三个重点的方式告诉你呢?

事业:什么事都可以简单都说出来的啊。没那么长吧?

梦想:人生的故事和点滴,重要的是那个过程。就好像你小时候,你听太空人上太空的故事。或者汪洋中的一条船里的主角,又或者我国的科技人,潘建成 (KS PUA)苦中奋斗的故事。若把它们简扼地告诉你,哪有乐趣呢?

事业:我没那么多时间。哪像你,还在读书,有的是时间,精力。做了工,不像读书,开始后,就没有结束。像个吸取所有光的宇宙黑洞。

梦想:我可能不太明白。但是,我能说的是,一天里,好好地发个好梦,也算不错啊。看看朋友的近况,听听一些舒服的歌曲。压力是有,但是不能忘记编制自己的故事。

事业:什么故事?每天都那么累。

梦想:自己的故事。做你喜欢做的事,就是一个故事了。故事不需要复杂,不需要很大。

事业:每天都过着普通的生活,哪有故事?

梦想:故事,只需要真诚和耐心。说的人真诚,听的人有耐心, 就可以了。

事业:哪有那么简单呢?

梦想:想想吧。可能你开车时,听到的音乐;或者和朋友聚餐,谈到的话题;或者做工面对的难题,都可以是自己的故事。没有人可以质疑你的故事,或者决定它有多精彩。因为那是你自己最宝贵的经历。

事业:单纯。。。。

梦想:很多时候,我们忘了,笑对人生,单纯的心,很可能像个笨蛋,但是却是最难能可贵的心态。

事业:如果雨后,没有彩虹,那岂不是很失望。

梦想:雨后有没有彩虹,不是看天,是看你自己的。

事业:哦??

梦想:如果你心中没有热情,没有太阳,那雨后,又如何有彩虹呢?

事业若有所思,静下心来,开始慢慢咀嚼五味人生里的道理。

01 September 2012

The Rainbow

Never thought of how fast 10 weeks could just pass like this. This is sorta like a relativity concept in between the actual time that has passed and the amount of time you thought it would take.

Yea, so the end. The end of the summer internship. On an eventful day back in Malaysia, a historical milestone for the country and for my own life journey.

Looking back, in hindsight, the journey has been a bitter-sweet and meaningful one. It was pretty tough at first. The environment was pretty uptight. Still vividly remember on the very first day of the orientation, I got told off because I went to the toilet and was 'late' to come in. (because the EMEA Chairman has got into the boardroom before me)

Plus, with all the business and programming training and developments during the first week, I was thinking that how am I going to get through these 10 weeks, given the limited knowledge and experience I had on the asset management industry and programming.

Besides, as interns, we were given a task to form a group of 7/8 people to participate in the Portfolio Management Challenge. Given a virtual fund size of GBP 1mil, we had to come up with an investment strategy to outperform an actual benchmark within this 10 weeks.

Back then, I wasn't even sure that equities = shares, and what index weightings and P/E ratio are.

Well, the rest is history, they said.

The sweetest victory is to turn a doubtful and scary beginning, to a high-octane climax, and to a thumbs-up ending. When you managed to present the fund in front of so many MDs, you know that the late night studies on equities research are definitely worthwhile.

The 10-week would have been more challenging and tougher if there weren't these bunch of interns who continuously cheering you up, and the guidance provided  by my line manage, mentor and buddy.

Not to forget my buddy's colleagues. I still remembered that night, on the 3rd of July, when one of them left his work on the desk and taught me about alpha, beta and the concept of outperformance, while he was actually rushing his task to send over to the US people. This was because the 4th of July is the Independence Day in US.  (Oh and the CFA notes as well!)

My buddy has been a great teacher. He taught me how we should really focus on the important things in life, to make career decisions. He didn't take up a very lucrative job in an investment bank in the States, but would rather come over to Europe to have a family with his current wife. He recalled his experience back in 2007/8, when Lehman Brothers collapsed, he was overlooking the building from the other side of the street. He saw the throngs of people rushing over to the bank to get their savings. At that moment, he knew that money is not everything. It can come and go anytime, and it's not really within your control.

"Money can only give you that much, what is more important is what can you do with the money?".

And to my line manager, if possible I would really like to give him a toast, over a pint of Becks, or maybe two. The cool lad who does kite-surfing and chess. Without his patience and trust, I wouldn't be able to study so many software development concepts in the team project, and completed a graphical user interface. He admired the efforts I put in and allowed me to put my own signature on that small chunks of codes. It'll be launched globally in San Francisco, London and Tokyo in weeks to come, when everything is ready to get into production.

There are two things that move me to tears. Firstly, when your team member actually sends you a private message to send his gratitude, an acknowledgement of the efforts that you have put in for the portfolio challenge, while what you have done is nothing greater than just 'keep trying and keep going'; and the second one is the review by your line manager.

"It's great to have you here, Peter".

It has been a great 10-week. It really is. I couldn't ask for more.







10 August 2012

I dream a dream

It has been a tiring day, and you can't wait to fall asleep on the cosy bed that sits right across the workbench.

You are sleeping soundly. You arrive at the limitless ground of dreamland that brings back the fragrance of your memories, manifesting like a colourful bubble in your dream.

It's as if you are dancing gracefully in the space, looking for the rationality in the surprise that life has brought to you.

But, you smile at the irrationality, because nothing is prettier than having faith in fairy tales.

The night is dark, cold and lonely. You are as though the little girl who is selling the matches, hoping to light up a flickering flame on the candle, seeking for a warm shelter.

Life brings us patterns that we have no idea how to decipher, because they aren't rows and columns of white pendaflour lights in the office.  

You hold on, eventhough it means nothing to everyone, because it means something to the small corner in your heart.

It's like that girl in your dream, that you wanna hug so much till the dawn of sky, and see the sky burns down to a sweet yellow.

And, you wake up.

You see a clear blue sky. The tranquility that cheers you up to a bright new day.

08 August 2012

Work2Break

It seems like ages ago since I have taken a proper break. Suddenly you feel like you wanna be a reckless driver-drive into a dimension where your Kancil will become an A380 airbus.

I thought I was busy. But instead, it's just so I thought. I wasn't that busy, yet I am taking less breaks than before. Most people claim that they have no time for this and that, but if they were to take a step back and look, they will definitely have the time to do things that they wanted to do so badly.

That was an old claim, an old thought that people knew but forgot to do it still. We still claim that we are busy. 

Sometimes, we tend to forget that a few words will paint a rainbow in a person's rainy day. 

Working life is like turning a blue sky into a grey one, and hoping that one day it will turn back into a clear, sunny day. We are working so hard, so that we can take a break later. 

Our teachers and parents told us so. And, many people told us so as well. 

We forgot to smell the flowers; to feel the wind; or even to touch the wall, which used to vibrate the vibes of laughter. 

Our footsteps, try to catch up with our minds. And, we lose touch with the pavements that we are walking on.

The suits, the shirts, covering the gold statues, which imprisons the happy souls and the childish acts. 

Your daily route is fixed, like a procedural programming language, telling you to take a tube from Queensway station and get off at the Liverpool St. station every morning, with an exception of weekends. 

Deep down, I miss the smile. As big as the sun. cheering me up to a bright sunny day :)


20 July 2012

The Paradox of Crowd

Coming out from the tube station, walking towards the crowd, feeling like a small fish in a big pond, swimming across the lonely souls.

The more people you meet, the more lonely you are.

Getting down the stairs, to the basement of the heart. You begin to wonder, how she feels and how she thinks.

Like a soulful briefcase, waiting for the light across the road to turn green.

Rows of coffee shops, brewing the closing eyelids. Standing by the counter, reminds you of the virtual coffee breaks, which you drank over the words on the instant messaging space.

Call me insane, finding words and emotions amidst the numbers and pie charts. That's exactly how it is. You need the night to see the moon, and touch the cold to feel the warmth.

There ain't a dream that built on a pile of cash and coins. Cause a dream is like your sweetheart that sweeps off your feet.

Are you brave enough to kiss your dreams?      

03 July 2012

夏天里的雨季· Summer Internship 的起跑点

伦敦这城市,有点儿忧郁。被雨水覆盖着的街道两旁,也显得特别冷清。

第一次在伦敦里当起上班族,也算是开始慢慢体验着当地人的生活。没有学生的悠闲,没有时间的自由,看来朋友告诉我她想念大学的生涯,是对的想法。

那地下铁(Underground Tube), 就像去年我每天都会准时去搭的LRT一样。每天都要求神拜佛,不要那么多人挤进来,否则,那半小时的火车路程,就够痛苦了。

一天两、三杯咖啡,也算不了什么。看回去,原来和我的大学生涯,也相差不远。对于两者,都不会怎么去留念。至于个人发展呢,那又另当别论。

这里的工作环境,拥有着数不尽的挑战;你身边的summer interns, 都几乎曾经在大银行里做过暑假工, 如 Goldman Sachs, Morgan Stanley 或 BoA Merrill Lynch 。你的上司(line manager) 和他的朋友,都曾经身历金融界的大事件。

一个,当年在纽约华尔街(Wall St)的 Morgan Stanley 里做工,亲眼目睹Lehman Brothers 倒下的那一刻;另外一个当年在Barclays里上班时,有份参与收购Lehman Brothers的买卖。

这些人,也算是应了 “成也银行家,败也银行家” 这句话。

前几天,在那暑假工的迎新日里,才发现一个很震惊的数据。人事部( HR)告诉我们,今年的录取率是历年新低,从大约5000位里选出60多位。低下头算了算,录取率都不到2%;这公司还要从这群学生里遴选 first-year analyst。

当然,里面也不乏有好笑的事件。

有位学生在面试里,为了得到这份工,信誓旦旦说 “I am up for any challenge”。

结果,今天,她的上司就给了她一个蛮艰难的任务。

她便说, “我没有这方面的经验。”

“没关系。你说你能够面对任何挑战。你在面试里不是那么说的吗?”

她吓了一跳,不知道自己的一字一句,都被记录下来了,唯有恨自己当时的信口开河。

其实,若把压力,竞争,放一边;这里能够学到的知识和经验,可以说是无价的。

真的,你看得越多,越觉得自己的知识有限,越觉得世界太辽阔了。

但愿,雨季过了后,会有彩虹的出现。:)






20 June 2012

My First Publication




My first anthology of short stories. Do have a look and spread it to your friends!

Key description: 
An anthology of short stories about my personal journey of thoughts and reflections. Stories about the small things in life which have inspired me to pen down the doubts, fears and uncertainties of a young college student.


Free Kindle for PC/Mac softwares are available.